Happy and content

I think I need to start writing on my way home from work again. It’s getting hard to recall how I felt during the day other than “it was good”, and once home, it’s hard to find the motivation to actually write anything I find interesting! I don’t, after all, just want this to become a regular “today I…” form of diary. It’s supposed to be my private forum for reflection and growth.

Anyway, I noticed something this weekend when speaking to a friend of mine, who’s planning on starting her own business, but was feeling exhausted from all the studying that she was also doing. As a result we started speaking of how superhuman some seemed, because they did so much while I felt like I did almost nothing at all, beside go to work. As the afternoon wore on however, and as I was telling her of the various things I have going on in my life, I realised that I do actually do quite a lot, which made me wonder, Björn seems to think that it’s not just because I place other people’s achievements ahead of my own, but also because my definition of what achievement is, to all that which I don’t do myself.

The funny part is that at some level, I do seem to have realised this, because although I still get a little (a lot) intimidated by these people, I’m coming to (note: I’m not there just yet) the conclusion that I can be content with what I do, as long as I feel like I’m content with the actual the “stuff” that I DO do, that I should have no need to tell people about the stuff that I do. Basically, don’t get suckered into a comparison of sizes.

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