So after a loong post in my “diary” yesterday, I really started to feel the need to find some way to find a digital version of it. Not just because after 11 years of having the same worn down book it’s finally coming close to it’s last pages (which I guess is a good thing seeing as I usually just write when I’m feeling overwhelmed and frustrated or negative, so 11 years for a normal size notebook tells me maybe things aren’t so bad I like sometimes believe). However, it does go faster and cleaner (so less corrections all over the pages), I can keep it close at hand, make a back up, make notes as I wish without it needing to be long texts, and because I have some kind of technology with me most of the time (sad, I know) I can even post when the mood hits
If there’s anything that has helped my through my moods for the past few years, it’s being able to read something I’ve written in the past and (more often than not) realise, that what I’m feeling right now, I’ve felt before, and I got over. It makes me realise how average that problem might actually be, at least for my head (so it’s doesn’t have to feel as huge, and thereby looses it’s hold on my), notice habits or recognise my moods (so that I can identify them and work at bettering them so that they loose their “heaviness”), and finally, as was the case yesterday, work, process and mold my those powerful and heavy thoughts into something a little bit more malleable and therefor manageable (so that I can finally let go and move forward).
Maybe by using this digital version of a diary I can even get a creative streak into my writings, who knows. It makes it easier anyhow, and more interesting, because then I can add whatever pictures and what-not as I want. Maybe, just maybe that will help me with my memory issue as well. Since obviously I’m having some of that as well. Maybe more about that another time. For now I feel like I’ve made a new friend, so I’m going to enjoy it for a bit.